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2 A.M. : Is Today's Epiphany A Wise One??

Thursday, January 28, 2010

Writing "morning pages" in an effort to proceed with my "Artist's Way" goal... Three longhand pages every morning, with no real "POINT", just a mind blurt to get things flowing, mind de-gunked, all that.... And while most of the time my morning pages end up being either a laundry list of whines or a cataloguing of my things needed to get done that day, sometimes there are real epiphanies that appear in the middle of the messy piles of handwriting (SO messy, since these days I have to "morning page" with Noah around, so I RACE to get them written before he really needs me. The little needy cute irritating lovable stinker.)

Today's epiphany--- that the massive things on my to-do list that cause me the most angst and anger are my personal photo albums/photo books... Well, that part isn't the epiphany. I've know about this stressful task since forever, and it WEIGHS on me. So much so that I finally committed, hardcore, to get them DONE this winter, while business is slow.

And here it is, January 27th, and have I touched them?

Um, no.

Of course not.

Easy to keep finding OTHER things to do instead. Worthy things. GOOD things. But not THIS thing. The task of completing the sorting, purging and cataloguing of my personal photos so I can insert them into the coffee table books I have planned.

And it is like I am dragging around an extra 20 pounds of psychic WEIGHT because of it.

So today's epiphany.... what if I just PUSH??? Push push push and schedule this task with some hardcore deadlines and even some hardcore all-nighters? If I can get a GOOD stretch of time, I can really DO this thing. But as a mama, there is no such thing as a GOOD stretch of time...

Except in the middle of the night.

Hm.

What if I pulled a few all-nighters to REALLY get ahead?

(are you with me? Have you seen I am writing this at 1:57 am??)

Lucky for me, Joe's schedule this semester is really great in the mornings. His earliest class is 11:00 am, so if I could get him on board with my harebrained scheme, he could cover for me in the mornings after these work binges and we'd ALL win. I'd knock these horrible things off of a THREE-YEAR-LONG TO-DO LIST and he'd get a photo album to enjoy and we'd both get sleep... just at incongruous times.

And.... so it is 1:59 am.

And 2006 is DONE except the "hit send" button. Now, before you congratulate me too much, 2006 was 75% done, and has been 75% done for, oh, three years. It just needed to be FINALIZED. So this didn't take an ALL-nighter, just a REALLY LATE-nighter.

The next three years are going to be......... PAINFUL.

I just take too damn many photos.

*sigh*

Anyway.... the point is... the epiphany today felt REALLY sound. Good. Exciting. Like I could PUSH through these blocks and GET THESE THINGS DONE, and then maybe be better about keeping up on them over the years from now on.

But it is now 2:01 am and I'm wondering.....

Was that epiphany a wise one?

am I out of my mind?

Or am I reclaiming a piece of my mind by clearing this out and getting it done?

I'm off to bed. I'll maybe have a better idea in the morning. When I am tired, dragging, but DONE with 2006.

Ah, who knows.

sorry for the boring blog post.

I have two really fun ones up my sleeve and hovering in Lightroom, waiting to be edited. One is a tutorial and one is a Bare-it-All you'll love and maybe even want to go try for yourselves...

But they're not here, not now. Still need to be finished and posted.

So you get a crazy lady rambling session at 2:03 am.

And that is all.

Time to spell check and publish and GO TO BED.

(and boy oh BOY do I need spell check. I type like a true blue FOOL, I do.)

(Turns out "nighter" is not a real word. And I used it 4 times. Well, 5 now. neener, neener, I'm keeping it in. It serves my purposes.)

Night-Night! :)

(2:08 am). Done. For real.

6 comments:

  1. you are inspiring me. while the things that i have to do have not been there since 2007 (although my kids baby books kind of count) i need to PUSH to get some things done. at least a little. because that feeling of being done, or of at least starting to get close feels so good. however you choose to do your pics (middle of the night or not...) you can do it!!!

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  2. I'm thinking a laptop (business expense) and a crafty weekend in July is just what you need. :)

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  3. DAWN!!!!!!!!!!! That's what I'm doing when I come. You are a genius.

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  4. Yes. Yes you should. Why? Because if you don't, four years from now you will end up with two hope chests (one of which is really a toy chest you stole from your own child) that won't even close because they are so stuffed full of mementos from a life lived well. And you will be forced by the universe to deal with them. And things will be lined up in stacks all over your bedroom floor by decade and you will cry when your children shuffle the piles while you're not looking because you were too busy trying to figure out your scanner.

    Metaphorically speaking of course...

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  5. Yeah, now I feel like I need to go do that with my photos... I just have different problems- I have a big pile of hard-copy photos that need labeling so they can go into some sort of album...
    Then, I have to actually do my digital photos from the last three years as well. Granted, I won't bother with any real editing besides cropping, but it is still an overwhelming task.

    Maybe if we just push through it together...?

    Whatever the case, good luck! Get some sleep. Now.

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  6. Ugh. Coffee table books are desperately needed to be made by me as well.

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