Mind Dump.... Nothing Too Important.

Sitting down to edit after a long full day with Noah. I'm wearing, odd as it looks, a GORGEOUS new skirt I ordered online that came in the mail today. It was too cute to resist. So I tried it on and kept it on. Atop that cute skirt is an equally cute apron made by my amiga Anna. The patterns clash, but none of this was intentional. Atop that is the fuzzy fleece blanket my friend Stef made me (Okay, made NOAH, but I adopted it). I have headphones in. I am listening to "Fireflies" by Owl City on repeat. I will be editing the Hilson family tonight. My goal is to get it all done by midnight, and maybe even get started on Ellen's session. I plan to watch last night's Glee, then maybe pop in either "Firefly: Disc Four" (hm. Coincidence with the song I am listening to. Ha!) or Harold and Maude, Katie's favorite movie that I got from Netflix. (Been FOREVER since I've seen it, so I basically remember nothing.)

Today, Noah and I went on a cupcake delivery run-- taking the leftover birthday party cupcakes from yesterday's party o the mamas who tried to come but had to cancel out last-minute. The purpose of this mission was two-fold-- 1. let the gals know I missed them, and 2. keep the cupcakes out of MY gullet. Man I have NO willpower where cupcakes are involved.
Ya wondering where photos of these cupcakes are? Still in my camera, on the card. I'll get them on here, I promise. Just.... not right now.

Packing is happening in fits and bursts.... There's this strange limbo between not wanting it to happen at all, and wishing our deadline was tomorrow so we could be DONE with the in-betweenness.

There are no photos on this post. Weird. My apologies. I wanted to blog about Noah's birthday, but like I admitted earlier, the photos are still on my card. I thought to post Family #3 from my California sessions, but they are too special for this random mood I am in. I need to think through what I write about them first... I also have a couple of other random blog posts floating in my head, but I don't have the images to support them yet, so.... Just forgive this photoless post of randomness. As alluded to in the journal post from a few days ago, this blog is my journal now, and I just felt like checking in.... And who knows? Maybe one day the minutiae of this little blurt will be endearing to read later, when I am living an entirely different life. To that end, a few more bits of that minutiae as I settle in mentally to editing for the night.

* Noah is really snuggly at bedtime. I DRINK IT UP. He was not a cuddle-baby, so I absorb every little hug, snuggle and love word I can get from the stinker. Love him...
* I made real mashed potatoes for dinner... even with it just being Noah and I. I rarely have that kind of cookin' mojo when it is just the kid and me. But they turned out YUMMO... I used Alabama Kate's trick of stirring in a packet of dry Ranch dressing mix. YUM.
* I am on #5 repeat of this song. Still love it. The video is REALLY charming.
* I bought a speedlight (Canon 580ex ii) the other week... used it at Noah's party. It scandalized the girls who were there that had also been at my little workshop last Saturday. I laughed, shrugged, and said that sometimes you just gotta have a flash. I love my speedlight, but am hopelessly untrained in all it can/will do for me. Still--- good to have. Good to begin learning.
* My own personal typos are horribly irritating to me. I get so angry at the consistency with which I type "wither" instead of "either".... "grovery" instead of "grocery".... to only name two. I HATE TYPING BADLY.
* I confess to being more in love with sewing than photos at the moment. The early stages of burnout? Maybe. Good thing I have a December hiatus coming up. YAHOO! Then I'll be itchin' to get going again with photos by mid-January. Email me. Let's do something clever that month.

Okay.... on that note, I won't get that December hiatus if I don't get to the November photos. Time to proofread this typo-laden atrocity, add in a link or two, then get outta here. If you stuck with me through this randomness, you are SWEET. Kind. And loyal. Or perhaps just really BORED. If you truly ARE bored, leave me a comment. I've been jonesin' for some good, sweet comments recently. Must be the gloom of November making me crave friends... Ha!

Off I go. This post won't proofread itself. *sigh*

Once in a While, There is a Wedding... {St. Louis Wedding Photographer}

As I continue to hone my craft and learn more about myself, I begin to see that the gorgeous-but-high-stress world of weddings is not my natural habitat. Back in the day, I cavalierly agreed to tons of weddings, naive to what work it really entailed. These days, I am much more enlightened, and therefore highly nervous about what I might do wrong to mess up such an important day. Ha!
Having said that, when I sit, at the end of the day, and pore over the hundreds of images of breathtaking brides, gowns, details, and settings from the weddings I DO do, I can't help but lose myself in the fairy tale, and I am glad I was there.

This is Rachel and Troy, and they are St. Louis folk, through and through, if you can't tell by the journey to STL landmarks we took for our photos. While the Arch and the Stadium are givens, I have to say I was extremely charmed by Troy's request that we stop by his old stomping grounds where he and his friends grew up, deep in the city. (See the shots with the chain link fence behind them. That's their old baseball field!) I was also in love with the stop off at Gus's Pretzels-- apparently a St. Louis institution I have NOT been introduced to until now. We need to go sometime!!

It was an adventure wrangling NINE bridesmaids and NINE groomsmen, but everyone was incredibly charming and sweet, and I can see why Troy and Rachel love their circle of loved ones and friends so much. What an incredible group!

So yep... once in a while, there is a wedding in my mix. Beautiful brides, gorgeous cakes, and a little stretching outside my comfort zone. I'm feeling pretty good at the end of it all.

Congrats, you two--- I wish you a long, fulfilling life together!!

Halloween MiniPortraits {St. Louis Children's Photographer}

I never got around to sharing some my favorite shots from my Halloween Minis.... So, since Friday the 13th is kinda scary, here is a Halloween Flashback-- enjoy these cuties (and okay, okay... my kid is one of them. I'm not gonna lie!)





(And at 2 months old, that lil' Peapod named Oscar was my youngest model. What a snuggly little cutie!)

Happy Friday the 13th!

I Am Neither Here Nor There

{my bedroom window, five minutes ago... do you see Noah's birthday hat from last year? Noah's sticker sheet he puts all his sticker on? Joe's dirty laundry? Cute. All of it. :)}

It's a lazy Wednesday... a day where we get Joe home for all of it except two hours in the middle when he has class (right now, actually...). These days are lovely because we share duties, we both get to play with Noah together, and we both feel.... freer, somehow. (Is 'freer' a word? Looks awkward.)

Today, though, while feeling this way, also feels......unsettled. Partly because of the waning, fading time of year, partly because there is no PURPOSE to today-- no sense of URGENCY at tackling my to-do list... And partly (or mostly) because I am beginning to keenly feel the sensation that I am neither here nor there in my little life. This is no longer my home. Not really. But we are not yet in our new home. The warm, cozy, temporary haven we will be settling into for 7 months.... Feels good to know it is there, waiting for our final move at the end of December. But it is not yet home.

So though I COULD be packing... could be working on projects.... could be even working a bit, nothing feels urgent, nothing feels important... nothing feels settled.

It's easier to listen to good mellow music (I've finally downloaded THIS song, which I LOVE-- thanks for the reminder, Ellen!), maybe pick up a book and read, surf the Internet, maybe sew a little... easier to do these things than to muster up the passion for anything really critical.

And... I think I'm okay with this current inertia. It feels... cozy. I feel okay not feeling anything too strongly for a minute.

Still... I think my to-do list will get mad at me soon, so.... maybe I need to get up and get moving.

Then again, maybe not. Maybe I'll keep feeling this strange slowness today, and begin again tomorrow.

Oh, wanna see the cute "Morning Art" Noah and I made today?

Love it. :)

Today is okay, just the way it is.

Ellen, You Asked For It: Senior Portrait Sneak Peek

LOVE this. More than I can explain. LOOOOVE.

Oh how it will be fun to really get elbow deep in the rest of these images! But I have a wedding to finish first, and another darling senior to put final touches on.... So my dear Ellen, two weeks. Can ya make it? :)

The SoCal Sessions, Pt. 2 {St. Louis Children and Maternity Photographer}

Part Two of our California trip-- After our amazing stay in Carlsbad, we headed to Murietta the next day to enjoy the company of Jess and her sweet family. G. is a precocious 6-year-old, and M. is Noah's age. Both are GORGEOUS, and no wonder-- wait til you see their mama! Jess is pregnant with baby#3, so instead of a traditional family session, she requested a maternity session. She was also the winner of my blog contest earlier this year, where she won a free mini-session for her kids, so I got to have extra time playing!

Noah loved running around with these kids, and Joe was a sport-- babysitting my kiddo while I put on the "photographer hat" and did the session.

Check it out:
























And of course, Dad rounds out this great family. He was as sweet as the rest of them! :)

Jess, I was so delighted to have this time with you. You have the most infectious smile, and your spirit and energy is magnetic. Wish I was your neighbor in real life. I am so serious!:)

Oh, and while I'm talking up this gal, you HAVE to check out her baby gear. She is a small-business owner gal who makes cute, trendy, well-made doodads like baby blankies, paci clips, baby leggings, bows... The list is LONG, and the stuff is CUTE! Her shop is called
BubbaDoodle Baby Gear,
and while she is about to have a baby of her own and might be off for a few weeks, think about checking her out for your next baby shower gift or something for your own little one!

Love it!

Next CA session: Fullerton and Dawn's cute family! :)

November, Again and Again

It was around this time of year, thirteen years ago, that I became a TRUE journal writer. Up until that time, I had tried and failed again and again to keep a journal/diary. I had lovely gift journals lined up on my shelf, filled with three, maybe four sporadic entries before the motivation disappeared until the next gift journal. Such were my younger years.

But then, a year into college, something CLICKED. I was in San Fransisco, exploring the SFMoMA and the several cool shops nearby, when I found a PERFECT blank book and a perfect set of colored pencils.


I decided, suddenly, I wanted to just keep a notebook of observations, random thoughts, sketches, and clippings, starting with the amazing trip I was on right then. Not even a JOURNAL. And it was THEN, that CHOICE right there, that changed journaling for me. No longer did I need to document every day in detail... I just..... began capturing moments. Not daily... Just when it felt right. And that began a lifelong love of observing, saying thanks, and jotting my life down... a little here, a little there... In books, on blogs... Just--- finding time to BE IN THE PRESENT for a minute and put it down for remembrance.

I've been packing a LOT recently, and just got to my stack of journals... lovingly placed them in a waterproof tub along with my favorite inspiring books I keep nearby. this tub won't go into storage. This tub will stay near me, even in our time of transition. But being taken off the shelf and placed AWAY makes me nostalgic, so I thought it'd be a crazy little idea if I looked through them a bit before retiring them... and finding what I was writing about on this day of the year for the last several years. So I skimmed, enjoyed, lovingly touched my old journals and found November 5-- or the closest date to it, in several of my books. Scanned them... Dated them... and here for posterity-- a sampling of ME, from age 20 until today. My woes, my to-do-lists, my little moments of gratitude, my thoughts...

Why not?

This is me. It is who I was, who I am, and who I will likely be, even many years from now... So enjoy-- if only for the visual randomness. But if you get bored and really wanna read, I'm giving you permission. I think some of them might be read-able even in scanned, web form. If something amuses, surprises, or resonates with you, please feel free to share with me in the comments. This is, after all, a bit of my soul I am sharing. Share back, if you feel it.

1997- third year at BYU, Galaxy Core friendships...roomies with Cindy...

1998- Made this journal in bookbinding class, still at BYU, changed majors to English
1999- Macaroni Grill, BYU still, a bit adrift, but on the cusp of learning who I REALLY was...
2000- Living alone for the first time, passionate about writing, independent films, and single for the first time in three years...

2002- FRESHLY moved to St. Louis, did not know a soul in town, trusting the Divine to lead me where I needed to be... But lonely.

2003- Finally settled into a life in St. Louis-- going to grad school, working at Macaroni Grill, feeling centered.
2005- Married for one year, loving being a wife, first year of teaching stressing me out, but surviving.
2007- VERY pregnant with Noah, ready to be a mama, but totally unprepared for what complete CHANGE was about to happen.
And there ya go... a few years from my Novembers.

Happy November 5th. Now you go. Go write something in your journal/blog/notebook... Just for fun. Just because. I did it. :)

The SoCal Sessions, Pt. 1 {St. Louis Family Photographer}

Back in September, I had the incredible opportunity to travel for my photography again. This year has been so good to me for destination photography-- first with the Wisconsin sessions, then the DC sessions... So it was really cool to finish up my traveling for the year on the West Coast, in gorgeous, sunny California.
Since I ditched my boys in DC, I thought it would be fun to bring them along, so Joe, Noah and I hopped a plane, bound for sun and friends and photos and DISNEYLAND!

I'll share some of the personal "vacation" photos soon, but I wanted to start by sharing my first session in CA. Steph and her family live in Carlsbad, near San Diego. We headed down there our first afternoon, and enjoyed an incredible evening with this gorgeous family. Steph packed a cooler of appetizers and snacks for our beach session, so that when we were done shooting, we could just plop down on the sand, enjoy the amazing sunset, and nibble on cheese, artisan breads, crackers, and other yummy things while Noah and her son played. It was completely delightful. And we even managed to get some of my FAVORITE images I've taken this year. Check out Steph and Company:












{did you see Joe and Noah in that background? Hee! I kept it there for the preview, but cloned it out for the final print. I just love seeing them as part of this experience! They had a great time..}








{oops.}





Truly, this setting inspired me... Something totally different from St. Louis, the colors, the smells... It made me have to think outside the box, and I love the results.

And afterwards? As if Steph's cooler of appetizers wasn't enough, she and her sweet hubby took us back home with them and made us an incredible steak dinner. It happened to be Joe's and my anniversary that night, and honestly, we couldn't have asked for a better dinner at any restaurant. They are amazing chefs!!

It was a beautiful, delicious, relaxing way to start our trip. Thank you, Steph, for hosting us with style in Carlsbad!

*

Next up-- Murietta, CA and a cute preggy mama and her two kiddos, with a couple shots of her hubs thrown in. I'll post those tomorrow! :)

(And with regards to my traveling for sessions, I have at least two BIG trips planned for 2010. Stay tuned for that announcement!)