It is December. Already. and with it, the real cold, finally, after an autumn of rain and mild sunny days... And, oddly enough, I welcome it. The chill. Right now, in the busy, frenzied, blinders-on rush of life I am living, I welcome the soul-cleansing, blastingly frigid reminder to WAKE UP AND OPEN MY EYES TO THE NOW. I welcome it with wild, outstretched arms and the barbaric YAWP that says, "I am ALIVE! Remind me to never forget!!"
I want to not be afraid of the dark and the cold and the bleak and the bare... But to let it teach me.
Let it teach me that I have enough, and to be grateful for the plenty in my life.
Let it teach me that for every ebb, there is an eventual return of FLOW...
Let it teach me to go within, figuratively and literally, and embrace it. The season of inner life...
Let it teach me to be innovative and resourceful with what I'm given, even when it is sparse.
Let it teach me to look harder for beauty, and be happy with what I find.
Let it teach me to love even the cold and the dark and the bleak and the bare.
And I want Noah to love it, too. So we went on a walk the other evening, just after his warm, deep, long nap... We bundled up and got the stroller, and let the sun set on us as we walked (for nearly the last time) our tree-lined majestic street looking for leaves and pumpkins-on-porches and the beginnings of Christmas lights. Noah and I talked about Christmas, and I taught him the concept of deer and wreaths. (I think he gets it. He was sad to leave the "deer" at each house that had the lighted ones on display. He did keep calling wreaths "leafs" though... Hm.)
And as we strolled, I breathed in the sharp air, tucked my sleeves around my fists, and thought about the winter to come. How it felt to be enlivened by the brisk chill... How Noah came to life after his drowsy nap and wanted to explore EVERYTHING. and I vowed to not stay indoors the entire winter. I vowed to get us out for even fifteen minutes every day... to look for pine cones or to hunt for dogs to make bark in their back yards (Noah loves that game!)... To breathe and shiver and look and be ALIVE...
And then to go back in and be grateful for warmth and home and hearth and all the abundance we have under our (red, cold) noses.
The chill is here. But I am ready. And I am warm.