40 Weeks: We Got Here. We're Still Here. :)

Welcome to my due date. 4.11.11. It was always a cute lil' due date... Like, "What's the 411, yo?"

Well, the 411 is that 4.11 has come and nearly gone, and Lucy is still cozy in her tummy cave. But ya know what? I am okay. We are zen. Because after a weekend of debating our next move (all while waiting for some sign of labor, *fingers crossed*), we finally decided that an induction is NOT the end of the world. My doc had been trying to convince me of that--- that Pitocin does NOT always equal inevitable C-section.  That in fact, with everything progressing well cervically, induction might just end up being the way to a successful VBAC instead of a late-term C-section due to my diabetes or the baby getting super big... 

So. 

Sure. 

I'd have done this differently. I wanted the drama and magic of spontaneous labor. (I almost got it last week, when I had three hours of consistent contractions... But they dwindled.... and were gone.)

I wanted the slow build of contraction pain, not the WHAM of Pitocin ones. 

I wanted Lucy to have the chance to do it her way. 

But.

It's okay. Tomorrow morning, we'll ease into this experience with a bit of Pitocin and a lot of prayers, and by the end of 4.12.11, there will likely be a new kiddo in my life. 4.12 isn't as cute as 4.11.... But dang, this April has been so PRETTY that ANY date in April makes me happy. :)

So... As I blog one last time for a few days, sharing my random thoughts and moods at the end of this pregnancy, I have some fun stuff to share--- the Last Days of the Waiting, if you will. 

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First, as you can tell, I DID get one more belly pic opportunity. I went with bold color this time. Oh, what? You mean that's what I went with nearly EVERY time? Ha ha! What can I say? It's my style. :)

And the boys took a turn in front of that insane yellow backdrop:

My Joe, who I love. Who I will need with all my heart and energy tomorrow as we dive into baby-delivery mode:

And my Noah.... and his Mai, of course:

(love the faint Koolaid stain on Noah's upper lip... Also love that Noah helped me snap those pics of Joe. He s an aspiring photog, never mind he rarely gets the subject in the viewfinder. Minor issue, right?)

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Meanwhile, since I ended up getting a vast, unscheduled weekend this past weekend-- fully prepared to be having a baby, but not-- I managed to finish Lucy's quilt!! Here, about 85% done, is the pretty little thing, awaiting binding:

And WOW, what a labor of love and money this thing ended up being! I just really loved doing it, so every time I bought MORE STUFF for it, I just didn't feel too badly that it was turning into the $150* baby quilt. Yikes! It was so fun to try out a new skill--- to learn to go slow and be precise in the process of quilting. To see the pattern become a reality. And now that it is done, to get excited for its first washing (it gets all soft and crinkly when you wash it!)... and using it as a backdrop for some Lucy baby pics... 

So. Forgive me for just posting that peek pic. There WILL be a full quilt pic soon. SOOOOON. 

(*possibly an exaggeration. Possibly not.)

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Also, last Friday, when I was SURE I'd have that baby any moment, I waxed a bit nostalgic and sentimental as Noah and I eased into the day in the slow, sweet way we've been doing all winter... For months now, as I've been preggy and lazy, I've brought Noah into our room when he wakes and let him play on my iTouch or watch a cartoon... And I'll often doze another 20 minutes or so... And we'll just lounge in our pjs til one or both of us is STARVING and we HAVE to get up and go find breakfast. It's been so sweet... So cozy. So Friday morning, as Noah brought his favorite toys to the mix, I grabbed my camera and tried to find a way to catch a few moments of this ritual in a way that I'd always remember it. 

Because this will change. As soon as Lucy comes home. Mornings will inevitably change. 

So, a few of those snaps I tried to take.... Nothing QUITE captures the true gift of these moments with my Noah, but these photos try:

{in his jammies, on the pillow next to me, chillin' with Nacho, the sock elephant...}

{getting goofy}

{sunlight pouring into our east-facing window, Joe's Superman pillow... no agenda}

{Wall-E finds a hiding place. Noah asks me to snap a pic, then he wants to snap one of his own. Mine is the top one. I think I like his better.}

{communing with Lucy. Mai and Nacho are invited. Yes, that pale lump at the bottom of the frame is my belly...}

{just me and him... making faces at each other, getting in for a close-up...No makeup, not pretty... Just US.}

It's not a unique morning... And the pics aren't gorgeous... But the moments are, to me. 

And I know Noah will be an amazing big bro, and life will shift wider to accommodate the new baby... But there is definitely some Natsukashii at the loss of the ONE child to make room for the TWO children. 

I only hope Noah feels our palpable, intense love for him, even as Lucy comes into the scene. 

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And so. 

Tomorrow. 

As of tomorrow, I get a new, squishy, fresh baby in my arms. 

As of tomorrow, I will lose that 7:30 am wake-up and slow ease into morning. 

As of tomorrow, I will not be in control (Like I ever was. Ha!)

As of tomorrow, I get pancakes. Chocolate chip cookies. Cadbury MiniEggs. Back into my life. 

As of tomorrow, EVERYTHING changes. 

And I cannot WAIT.

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Good night, world!