Tuesday, August 30
Hello from No Post Land. I can't believe it's been over a week since my last post. And don't even get me STARTED on how bad I am at posting client sessions. Wow. GUILT CITY. But I have a plan for that part of it, so look for some session posts soon! And as for my personal posts, well.... Noah is now in preschool, as of yesterday (that needs a post of its own!) and I think I might be able to find time to blog a bit more again.
Meanwhile.... it's time for a major life update. Because as far as any reader knows, based on my blogging, my life is chock-full of a whole lotta THIS:
But it is time to announce, with deep joy and a LOT of relief, that our world is moving quite steadily more toward this:
Isn't that little face of hers mesmerizingly charming? Or maybe it's just me... But here's the big news:
Lucy is starting to be a happy baby. At 4.5 months old, I can report that the interminable colic and crying of her first 3 months has faded and much of the time during her awake periods, she is happy and content. Best of all, she let's me put her down--- on a blanket, in her new Bumbo, in the bouncy seat--- and I can actually use two hands to get things done. I cannot tell you how liberating that has felt!
Now don't get me wrong-- this baby is still INTENSE. She knows what she wants and lets you know if she's not getting it. She rarely has a mild "fussy" stage... She's either happy or MAD. Luckily, the percentages are skewing to the HAPPY more, so I can usually expect about 75-80% of her waking time is going to be pleasant, and I can therefore manage the unhappy times better.
Some of this good nature is just her maturing. I honestly think she has just been an old soul trapped in a tiny, helpless body, and has been SUPER frustrated to be unable to do anything. As she gains more skills and abilities, I think she feels relief. She is getting really good at grabbing at things and bringing them to her mouth, and I think she finds this immensely satisfying. She is also able to coo and chat with us, and will even "sing along" when I sing to her.
But another big piece of the puzzle has been her sleep. As a newborn, she's like most babies--- just trying to sleep as much as possible, wherever possible. But now that she's older, she has been showing signs of craving consistency and predictability, as well as a space of her own. She does SO MUCH BETTER if she can sleep in her own crib as much as possible. Too, she has been setting her own bedtime, and wants it super early--- between 6:30 and 7:00 pm. I'm telling you--- the things we've been trying to do to help her sleep well have been WORKING, and she is showing us how grateful she is for it.
So. Here we are. End of the summer... a looooooong summer of highs and lows (lots of lows), stress and worry.... a baby that didn't know how to be happy..... A couple of stressful trips thrown in.... And here at the end, things have turned a corner. I am gaining confidence in my life again. I am feeling able to dote on my baby and love on her and adore her, without the accompanying feelings of guilt and anger at how MISERABLE she could make me. I am able to give Noah more face time without seeming tense or haggard.
And all of this feels incredibly good. I feel lighter.I feel like I can move forward finally. I feel like I can actually tackle CLEANING MY HOUSE, finally.... Ha! You know how they tell mamas of new babies to let the house go and rest and take it easy? Well, did that advice count for FOUR MONTHS? 'Cause that's what I did. I neglected housework for FOUR MONTHS. Just so I could cope with my days. But now, with this new feeling of hope and confidence, I am actually kinda EXCITED to sweep. To scrub. TO make dinner once in a while. (gosh, I have been so bad at that stuff all summer. I'm embarrassed to admit it!)
Anyway. That's us. That's the latest in Lucy Land.
Coming up soon-- thoughts on Noah and preschool, a family walk, and maybe even a client session or two! But for now, Lucy is awake from her nap (too soon, I might add. UGH! There are still moments of complete anxiety and frustration--- I won't lie...) and I have some mama-stuff to attend to.
Posted by Emily S. at 11:07 AM